One of the benefits I have at work is that I get a certain number of days to creatively reset or build my knowledge. We can craft our own day or sign up for a guided class. Earlier this year I signed up for a lettering class. More recently, I signed up for a class to take an idea and turn it into a children’s book. (I tend to gravitate to the creative writing options.)
Our class met in the morning while an experienced author and editor laid out a typical writing process; Concept, Outline, Writing, Editing, Imagery.
Going into the class, I already knew I wanted to write a story about a child’s grief. My goal was to create something that would have helped my children 5 years ago.
What I wrote that day was a draft for a book that didn’t shy away from the word suicide. One that let the reader know they were loved and that its okay to still love someone who has died. A book that gives space to all the big, scary feelings we experience when a loved one dies unexpectedly but also saves room for laughter. Finally, one that provides a few small tools for the child to stay connected even after death.
It felt good to lay out everything. With unexpected death, there is no time to prepare. I didn’t get to mull over how and what to tell the kids. The news arrived and I immediately had to tell them. I don’t know if I did it ‘right’ but I did the best I could with my instincts. So, I wrote what I wished I’d had. A roadmap of sorts for the days and weeks ahead.
Our class got back together later in the afternoon for an optional share-out. The other participants had created such whimsy. It was fun to see how different their creations were. I had obviously taken a very different path, but I still decided to share anyway.
When I got done sharing, you could hear a pin drop. Not in a bad way, but it’s hard to compliment someone on writing a good children’s book about death. But the compliments I received were genuine. It was the most nervous I’d been sharing out story in a long time. However, I firmly believe the more we share about suicide loss the less taboo it is for the survivors. So, I’ll just be out here making everyone feel awkward.
