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Valentines, Valentines, Valentines Everywhere . . .

Posted on: February 8, 2023 | Posted by: Kathie Neff

. . . it’s here again

Image courtesy of Christopher Beloch via unsplash.com

In trying to take stock of Valentine’s Day past, memory is fuzzy. Images come forward of our last V-Day together…

Family room with hospital bed set up

Candles

Decorative hearts abound

Did we eat?

It seems a blip on the radar screen of a long goodbye with no clear ending in sight.

Hold on.

Hold on to each other.

That was February 14, 2021.

We hung out together knowing some sort of ending was coming, but time, as we knew it, was elusive.

 

Time was

interminable

and

also

fleeting.

 

No images come forth about the day set aside for celebrating love in the year 2022…zero recall.

 

Time waits for no one.

 

So here I am – 2023 – and this year I’ve decided to be “proactive.”

Definition of the word "proactive"

 

 

 

 

I’ve arranged to spend Valentine’s day with a small group of widows for dinner and a movie.

The details took some doing, but I sense a tiny bit of joy peeking through as I put the day in ink on my calendar.

Along the path of finding my way I ran across a few quotes to pass on to you, my friends, as V-Day makes it way toward us.

Each of the links offer ideas and perspectives to meet our many ways of being as widowers and widows. It is my hope that you may find something that feels helpful to you.

 

No matter where you land, remember: you are not alone.

 

Today, my love for life and the things I find meaningful get my love every day, because I know today is all we really have. That’s the amazing part about having been loved, having been so very lucky to experience the joy of Valentine’s Day in the beautiful and ugly parts of life. –Carolyn Moor

https://modernwidowsclub.org/best-valentines-gifts-for-widows/

 

Often we respond to the pain in our lives by instinctively shutting it out of our mind.  Denial is a form of disengagement but although it numbs the pain, it also delays our healing.

–Mary Francis

https://sisterhoodofwidows.com/2012/02/14/valentines-day-as-a-widow-4/

 

So I was facing my first Valentine’s Day as a widow … trying to heal from all of the losses my family had suffered when I realized that I wanted some things.

So, I bought my own Valentine’s Day gifts!

–Kristyn, Our ClassCee Life

https://ourclassceelife.com

Clear jar of many candy hearts, red, pink and white.
Image courtesy of Jacqueline Brandwayn via unsplash.com

Categories: Widowed, Newly Widowed, Widowed Memories, Widowed and Healing, Widowed Holidays, Widowed Emotions, Widowed Community

About Kathie Neff

Kathie Neff was widowed on April 15, 2021. She and her beloved husband, Dan, were high school sweethearts and enjoyed dancing and riding horses together. They lived in gratitude, hope and forgiveness for 50 years and nine months when Dan passed quietly late at night, surrounded by their seven children who, with Kathie, were caring for him in their family home.

Dan and Kathie have been a part of Camp Widow and Soaring Spirits International since its inception, as members of Michele Neff Hernandez’s cadre of helpers from the Neff family.

Kathie believes strongly in the strength and bond that is the gift of community and brings a heart of love for all who have been affected by death and dying.

Long live love. XO

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