Widow's Voice

Long lost Pineapple Shorts

| Posted by:

I’m laying in bed and I’m only 4 days away from heading to Hawaii. I post on Facebook about the trip. In the post I ask who am I going to see there?

 

Within moments of me posting, I hear something slide and fall in the bedroom closet. Roan (my dog) gets off the bed and goes to the closet, looks at me, walks in and out and walks over to me. He looks at me and than towards the closet and back to me. I have a sudden feeling about Clayton. I get up and look in the closet….

I see that Clayton’s yard stick that reads “Antiques and Beyond” has slid down the wall towards the shelves. That yard stick has been there for almost 2 years. I look up towards the shelves it is pointing towards and see something that I had entirely forgotten about….Clayton’s pineapple shorts! He had bought those shorts about 2 years ago and wore them to the aquarium on his last visit there to see his favorite penguin.

There is no explanation for me to post “who will I see in Hawaii “, his yard stick sliding for no reason after 2 years of nothing and leading me to find Tin’s pineapple shorts that I forgot I still had. I truly believe these are signs…

Tin is always with me and I feel that something incredible and amazingly positive is going to happen in Hawaii ????????❤️????????

This is 2020 – My year of clarity!

I know I’m not the only one with these things happening. What signs have you seen????

About Bryan Martin

In 2016 my life all started to fall into place. A new job as a Supervisor for animals at a small aquarium along the beautiful Florida gulf coast. It was a dream for Clayton and I to move to the beach, get settled and get married. In June of 2017 my father passed away after a long battle with opiods and alcohol. Four months later, Clayton was rushed to the hospital and diagnosed with acute liver failure. Not having been able to truly mourn my father, I was faced with knowing that Clayton (Tin as my family calls him) would also be leaving me. I had dreams of marriage, vacations and a long life together. I watched all of those dreams fade away more and more each day as I cared for him until his final days. He passed away April 16, 2018 the day after my sister’s birthday.

Now I am through the fog of the first year and reality is setting in this second time around the sun. I’m very much alone in this sleepy beach town. I’m trying to just maintain balance with my new normal. I get depressed, angry, sad, jealous, confused and disoriented. Some days are better than others and I remind myself that it is normal. So many people think my life is back to normal and fulfilling because I work with dolphins and penguins but the magic left everything when Tin passed away. I have trouble feeling passion about most things that used to light my fire. I have feelings that oppose one another and it is exhausting. I want to feel happy for others but want to know why I can’t have what they have.

Along my journey, I have had tough days and some wonderful days but at the end of each day I still don't have the answer to my one question....Why?

TO LEAVE A COMMENT ON A BLOG, sign in to the comments section using your Facebook or Gmail accounts, or sign up for Disqus.