. . . we keep telling our love stories?
There is a beauty in love stories. We see it in rom-com’s like When Harry Met Sally. We see it in Marvel Films like WandaVision. Heck! we even see it in the nature stories of whale families and how they care for each other!
Love, in all its forms, is a beautiful story.
This will be my first Valentine’s Day without my beloved’s arms around me.
That’s how I began a Facebook post recently. One of my friends posted the following:
Share your story! Valentine’s Day is coming!
Here’s our story:
I almost scrolled on by.
I hesitated and wondered if it is would just be a bummer to read about the story of my beloved who is no longer on this earth.
I started typing and then erased it.
Then I thought,
Why not? . . . And so I did!
And when I found the photo above, with its glimmering lights shining like a veil between the couple, it made me think . . . in a beautiful way our story continues.
So I’ll say it here: For all the love–the past, the present, and the future–whatever and however that shows up for you, I wish each and every one of you a Happy Valentines Day.
MAY YOUR LOVE STORY, WHATEVER PIECE OR PIECES OF IT MAKES YOU SMILE OR FEEL GRATEFUL, MAY IT BE YOUR VALENTINE’S GIFT TO YOURSELF.
Today I am going to share the Facebook post with you. Here is our story, told through a random Facebook “template” that invited me to dive in. After some consideration, I took the leap. XOXO
This will be my first Valentine’s Day without my beloved’s arms around me. Thank you, Beth, for the invitation to participate in this Valentines challenge. I’m delighted to share our love story here today.
Share your story! Valentine’s Day is coming!
Here’s our story:
First Date: My beloved, Dan Neff, loved to tell this story. We went to a little place that was less than a mile from our current home. The place was called Sir George’s Smorgasborg and as a very young man Dan had just enough money for the dinner and toward the end of it I wanted to order a glass of milk and he had to count his change to see if he had enough. That was a big deal to him, such a big deal that later in life he took to carrying hundred dollar bills in his pocket all the time to make sure he always had enough money. :)
Married: 51 years + 9 months 
Age difference: 1 year from August to April and two years from April to August.
Who was interested first: Dan
Who is taller: Dan’s nickname for me (no joke) was Shorty. His nickname for my nickname was Short. 

Who said I love you first: Dan 
Most impatient: me (Edit on this one: On second thought, I claim this one a tie!)
Most sensitive: Me in the beginning and him later as we sort of traded places where feelings were concerned.
Loudest: I think that could be a tie depending on the situation.
Most stubborn: Totally me. Taurus!
Falls asleep first: 100% me! My husband said, “My wife is like a light bulb. She is either on or off.”
Cooks better: We each excelled in our own way of cooking. Dan was an amazing breakfast cook and he loved my tacos and enchiladas.
Better morning person: Definitely a tie on this one, although he spent more of his life starting his day before the sun rose than I did. So I guess he should be the winner of the morning person award.
Better driver: Dan had a better driving record so probably the better driver. We used to joke that when we were 80 we would take separate cars because neither of us like the other person’s driving. LOL!
Most competitive: Hmmm. I could be a very sore loser at cards and he was always very neutral if he lost. If he won he could be quite the bragger and in physical games of sport he was 100% the competitive one and then some.
Funniest: Dan had a really dry sense of humor and would come out with it regularly and at the funniest times. He made me laugh so often. Definitely he was the funniest of the two of us.
Where do you eat out most as a couple? Most often for easy access would be Pick Up Stix, but favorite for taste would be Anchos in La Sierra. Dan liked the skirt steak and I like the homemade tortillas.
Who is more social?: Definitely Dan. He was an extrovert who renewed his energy by being with people. I am an introvert and renew my energy by being home. I think we were a good balance for each other in that way.
Who is the neat freak? We both had the ability to make pretty big messes. Dan was less inclined to move things around and put them in different places to where I often move things around. So, he seldom lost things and I would often not remember where I put something. 
Where was your first kiss?: Probably next to my horse, Kimba, when we were out on a ride together.
Who initiated your first kiss? Cowboy Dan 
How long did it take to get serious? If it had been up to my dad we would’ve never gotten serious. We went steady for two years before we got married so we made a commitment to one another quite early on.
Who picks where you go to dinner? Since we both have big opinions we usually handled things like this by taking turns. Whoever picked the last time didn’t get to pick the next time. We used this method with which movie to see as well. Compromise.
Who is the first one to admit when they’re wrong? Dan was much more emotionally honest and direct, I think—one of the things that he taught me. In the beginning especially, I was not very self-aware.
Who wears the pants in the relationship? From 1969 to 1979 Dan wore the pants in the family. From 1980 into the new millennium it was a tossup. In our final years together I was pretty impossible about having my way. Long-term relationships can be complicated, messy, and also rich in their capacity to challenge each in their relationship to grow. All in all I think that was us.
Who has more tattoos? Me.
Who sings better?: I’ll let you decide. My husband described his singing voice as a cow pulling its foot out of a mud puddle.
Hogs the remote? : Dan owned the remote and I didn’t like watching TV for most of our years together, so I didn’t care. He liked it when I sat down to watch TV with him and was very amiable about deciding what we would watch. We ended up having certain shows we really enjoyed together and that was fun because we looked forward to sitting down and seeing what was happening with our TV family.
Spends the most?: Overall I think that would be me, although I never took to carrying hundred dollar bills around. It’s a sweet memory because he would often “save the day” by pulling out one of his “hunders”
Did you go to the same school?: Yes! And we rode the same bus to high school until he got a car.
Where is the furthest you two have traveled together?: Alaska
Who drives when you are going somewhere together? : First half of our marriage him, last half of our marriage me.
I am happy and proud to post a picture of me and my valentine
You’ll always and forever be my valentine, Dan Neff.
