I let go of something this week. I removed Tony from my ‘Favorites’ list in my contacts.

For three years, every time I opened my phone to make a call he sat at the top of that list. A reminder that no matter the news, I could not share it with him. It was time for me to quiet that reminder.

I don’t think I’ll ever delete him entirely from my contacts. He isn’t the only deceased person who remains in my phone, and he won’t be the last.

Part of me is glad he had a company paid cell phone. It took the decision on what to do with his number and phone out of my hands. Although some of the account verifications over the years would have been easier if I’d had them. But it was like him, one day here and gone the next.

Since that awful day, I have been tempted to text his number. However, I just could never bring myself to do it. The unknowns of who could possibly be on the other side of that number now is too daunting.

So there really was no reason to keep his contact as a favorite.

With zero fanfare, I unchecked the box. No longer in that top spot. He is now a regular contact. I hope someday another person will earn that location in my phone. Someone to call just because, to talk through what’s for dinner, to see if they need anything from the store, or the countless other mundane reasons we reach out to our favorites.

Tony will always be one of my favorite people. But that was a different life than I am living now. I have looked at that ‘Favorite’ list countless times over the last three years. Like everything, I get to decide when to make changes to my surroundings, no matter how big or small. This week, I was ready to take on this subtle change for myself.