It took 3 years to do it. 3 years to put up the Christmas tree.

The Christmas season has always been a favorite of mine. Growing up, I remember walking down the stairs to those twinkling lights and the warm sense of joy.

I loved the season so much that Michael and I got married on December 23rd.

After he died, the season and everything it meant died too.

Presents, joy, festivity….my heart screamed “Screw it all.”

But this year….3 plus years after Michael was killed, I’ve done it. I spent the day picking out new ornaments to add to our collection, a new tree skirt, mulled wine to sip on during decoration, candles to burn that smell of apple cider and spice. I even tuned the station to 95.5…Delilah…100% Christmas tunes…and I sang along…i whistled down the aisles.

I’ve spent the evening decorating our home and feeling that same feeling I did as a child, but with another type of warmth, the warmth of our love that still lives on…stronger than ever.

I’m excited to wake each day and look at the tree..the tree that has no gifts laid beneath it…since the one gift I could ever need is within me….planted by my one true love.

 

Our hearts grow tender with childhood memories and love of kindred, and we are better throughout the year for having, in spirit, become a child again at Christmas-time.

~Laura Ingalls Wilder