Photo by Marek Piwnicki on Unsplash
I want to believe in the Spirit world.
I want to believe and trust in Mediums.
I do believe in the Spirit world.
And I do believe and trust in Mediums.
Mostly.
And yet… I can’t help but feel disappointed.
Where were Mike’s and Julia’s spirits on a small group call with a medium late last night?
Why didn’t they show up?
I do – sort of – trust that the Medium was “for real”. Unless the other 4 participants were all on show for my benefit, which I don’t believe, they all had a powerful and genuine experience.
But me?
No sign of a Julia-type spirit.
No sign of a Mike-type spirit.
It’s possible that someone who was either, or a combination of, my maternal grandmother/Mike’s mum/Medjool’s mum rocked up. Someone who liked drinking tea, socialising, and playing cards. Someone who was “strong in her power”, knew what she was about, and liked me a lot (all of these women were/did so).
It’s possible too that Don rocked up – as a woman, or failing that, a man with a lot of loving feminine energy, which I know he had.
It’s possible also that Ed rocked up – she didn’t exactly use the word “witty” which is the word many of us ascribe to him. She did say “funny and dry-humoured”. Same same.
But I was non-plussed. (North American meaning of non-plussed, which is the opposite of the British).
“Meh”, as Megan would say.
In fairness, the Medium didn’t intimate that either or both of my parents had passed into Spirit, despite me looking the age I am and most people my age have lost at least one of their parents. That would have been a sign that she was a fraud.
For someone three decades younger than me she knew that his dad was in Spirit. And had been since his birth. Others too had powerful-seeming experiences. The images and messages the Medium received mostly resonated with them. One man’s wife had died in the past months, suddenly, and she knew all of that.
But for me?
Meh.
No Mike
No Julia
I am not even sure I “believed” the Ed or Don spirits, even if the “elderly maternal figures” seemed viable for a range of women I have been lucky enough to have in my life. She warned us not to have expectations. But really? How can I not?
I won’t stop believing in Mediums’ talents, even if I am disappointed with my experience last night. I don’t know how this stuff works, but I know that having expectations doesn’t really help. But again – how can I not?
I am left feeling “Meh”.
Cheated. Not just of their physical presence and love, but their spirits too.
