Today the plan was to write about how we put things off because we know it’s going to be hard. We have enough hard so if there’s a path of less resistance, I might just follow it. And then I put writing this blog off all day. Clearly, I’m sticking with my theme of stalling the hard stuff today. Today, finishing my Christmas shopping was almost easier than writing three to five hundred words.

I have digressed, back to the hard things.

There are so many things we must do right after our person dies. We call social security, the bank, utilities, plan a funeral, and I had the added bonus of filing for a tax extension. Therefore, when it came to some of the smaller things, I put them off.

I was also ‘fortunate’ that Tony left me a list of accounts and the accompanying usernames and passwords. (That sentence is gross to write but it’s true.) Having that bit of information, allowed me to just log in as him and put off making the changes for some of the miscellaneous accounts.

Last week, I got a notification that the credit card was expired on our Ring account. I went to log in under his username and it didn’t work. Apparently, I haven’t logged in for a while and the account didn’t recognize the device. I was locked out.

Enter the dreaded customer service phone call. Ugh.

There is nothing like calling a stranger and having to explain that your husband died over 18 months ago, and you just want to give them money. What I didn’t think about going into this call was that they would take safety measures seriously given they are a security company.

I was on the phone with them for an hour and half. I had to send them a copy of his death certificate. Then I had to send them a copy of his will saying that I should take possession of everything. I hate having to send the death certificate. It is an extremely private document I am required to share with strangers who don’t know all this man was, all they see is his personal information and exactly how he died. There is so much more to him than that piece of paper.

The woman was extremely kind and patient throughout the entire phone call. I’ve worked in call centers before; I know they are measured on productivity and hers tanked that day when she answered my call. However, she never made me feel a bother to her. This woman even had little uplifting quips for me, and they didn’t come across as anything other than sweet.

It wasn’t resolved with that first phone call; they had to escalate and call me back this morning. As of today, 19 months after his passing, I have completed one more of the never-ending to-do’s that come with a loved ones passing.

I dreaded it, but they were as kind as they could be given the situation. Now, if anyone wants to call AT&T for me, I’ll buy you a barrel of wine. That’s a big one for another day.