you know what’s
not easy?
talking about what
happened on march 25th, 2008
over and over and over and over
again.
(you people know this better than anyone).
i lived it.
i wrote about it
and now
i’m reading it out
loud to
crowds of people
i wouldn’t know
if it hadn’t happened to me,
to us,
a little more
than three years ago.
i thought it
would get easier,
as i kept talking…
it hasn’t.
but it has been incredibly
helpful for me
to talk about
it and to try to
give people even
a slight understanding
of what i was feeling
in that first year.
…
that said,
i often wonder
why the fuck i
put myself through
all of this?
is the pain
i endure every time
i open my mouth
at one of these events
really worth it?
yeah.
it turns out that
it is.
the shared experience.
that thing that
can help us relate
to one another
and convince ourselves
that we are not alone
in this shit
is more powerful
than i’d ever understood.
and the more
i share my experience,
the more people i
meet who can
help alter my perspective
in the most
incredibly meaningful ways.
so i keep talking
and crying in public
and it helps me
more than i could
have hoped.