it’s gone.
but how could it be?
i was just there
a month ago…
it had been there
since before my
memories of this city
were actual experiences.
close to 9 years.
we used to go there
when we lived in
the neighborhood.
almost every saturday
or sunday,
we’d sit under the
awning, on the sidewalk
listening to the cars
drive by, watching
the hipsters check
their look in the
reflection in the glass,
eating,
talking,
fulfilling that promise
we made to one another
that we would
never become that couple
who sat across the
the table from one
another, reading the
newspaper in silence,
speaking only
when one wanted
the other to pass
a certain section.
i can remember us
there, that first morning
after i returned
from india,
a short walk from our
apartment, i stumbled a bit
because the clock
had knocked me around.
we sat there
sipping tea,
and i told her
about my last day there,
and the cake in
my face, and
the gifts i was given
and the friends i
would miss.
i told her
i’d never leave her
again.
she liked that.
months later i would
go again,
and we both
would be sad,
even though we both
knew it was
the best thing
for our future.
i would come back
and go again
and again
and again.
thankfully i
skipped the
trip i was
supposed to take
on the day
that she died.
…
i remembered all of this
in an instant
as i drove by another
place, another thing
that is no longer here.