A very wise woman (also a widow) once me that when things get really-rock-bottom-bad; find a distraction.

A new distraction that doesn’t carry the weight of memories that include him.

I do a range of things at 2am when the darkness creeps in.  I read (always a solitary activity for me), or play endless games of solitaire and then pin things on Pinterest.  Anything soporific enough to induce sleep.

But in the day time, I take pictures.
I take lots of pictures.
I edit lots of pictures.

It is my go-to distraction for when life becomes tedious.

But to take the kinds of pictures I like to take, I need to walk.
I need to walk a lot over uneven ground whilst carrying a (surprisingly heavy) 1.4kg camera and a light but oddly shaped tripod.

Graceful, I am not.  Even with two working legs.

…. so it has been rather difficult to go on photowalks with a foot that is still badly sprained and bruised (thankfully, not as swollen as in that pictures from last week).

….and I could feel the tendrils of darkness creeping in again.

So last weekend, I took myself on a meandering stroll (limp) along a solid, even pathway.

…and the distraction worked. 

My foot is still sore and I still feel sorry for myself, but by distracting myself from grief long enough to create something of beauty was enough to reset my mood meter.

I know the grief is still there and I know it cannot be avoided nor circumvented, but these brief distractions when life turns to ash are enough to keep me going.

Thanks Megan – your advice still works so well….