it was time to 

go to take my perfect 

child to the doctor.

that perfect child

started screaming as soon

as i put her carseat

into the base.

tried to give her

the pacifier while driving

(exceedingly difficult while driving a car with manual transmission).

that didn’t work.

tried holding her hand.

that didn’t work.

tried rubbing her cheek.

nope.

we arrived at the doctor’s office, 

madeline still screaming.

nothing like a widowed

father carrying his screaming,

inconsolable baby into 

the waiting room.

oh the looks i got.

a father turned to me and said,

“you’re brave to do this without mom”

i turned to him and said, 

“i have no choice. her mom passed away”

instant tears for 

the man and wife.

madeline’s name got called,

the crying couple

wished me luck.

and i carried my

not-so-perfect child 

into the room.