Every holiday has its dark moments especially with the kids. You always feel like they are missing out on something no matter how great you make it. Father’s Day may be the worse. The first one after Joey passed was only a month after. I was still very numb and couldn’t even bring it to myself to wish my father a happy Father’s Day. I choose to completely ignore the day. Last year I purposely book a short family vacation to the beach with a full day of travel on Father’s Day. It seemed to work, none of the kids knew what the day was. Maybe this isn’t the best method but it worked for me. There will be plenty more and they will eventually be old enough that I won’t be able to shield them from the pain. Well two months after my daughter asked me when was Father’s Day. I explained to her that it had already passed and she was heart broken. So the method back fired.
I made her a promise we would never skip it again.
So this year we were at the beach again but this time coming home on Father’s Day. Ryann is almost 8 so she is more aware of things around her. She never forgot the date and all week asked what we were going to do for her daddy.
We bought wish lanterns. On Joeys first birthday after his death we did this and it seemed to be a good experience for everyone. So once we got home and the moon had come up we all went out front. We lit the lantern and all held a side. As the blue lantern started to rise we made Father’s Day wishes.
The kids sat in the yard for a good half an hour wishing Joey a happy Father’s Day and sending him their love. There were a few tears at the end but over all just love. I will not skip this holiday anymore. It’s important for them to celebrate it too. They deserve it, they have a daddy and they need to be able to express their love for him like any kid.
I sat behind them watching their faces look up to the sky and quietly whispered happy Father’s Day and prayed he could hear their wishes.