It was another 3:33 wake up morning but this one did not bring me a smile. Instead I was greeted with sneezing, coughing, runny nose, headache – and once up and fully awake – ugh, zero energy and a bit woozy. I think it’s just a cold and it will pass but I had all sorts of plans for the next few days. I guess I’ll need to take it slow and easy for a bit and choose some things from my list that don’t require much exertion.

So on that note of putting things off … I’ve mentioned before that I have a tendency to procrastinate. And I’ve been especially bad since Jim died. There was so much paperwork involved with his estate and the VA, along with updating contact info on accounts or autopay bills. And a real lack of customer service with most of that.

I’ve used a planner for years to keep track of appointments and to-do’s. I’m retired and, thankfully, don’t have very many strict timelines in my life. I’ve been able to meet the Tuesday morning deadlines for my weekly Widow’s Voice blogs. I’ve never missed a doc appointment or lab test. But for some reason my planner just isn’t working for this big list. It’s too easy to set it aside and ignore. And I have a pretty massive to-do list. So I pulled out an old whiteboard and wrote down all of the things I need to get done. Filled it right up. And I placed it in a spot I will see multiple times throughout the day so I won’t have any excuses. It feels good to be able to see some things getting crossed off that list.

The majority of the tasks on that big list are sorting through all of the ‘stuff’ – things that were stored and haven’t been used in years. Things I’ve never touched, never even looked at. We were so busy with health issues that we just never got around to the guest bedroom closets, the kitchen cabinet top shelves, the storage shelves in the garage and the cabinets in the workshop. So. Much. Stuff.

My community is holding a garage sale in April and I know I could have plenty to put out there that others might need or want. But I’m going to need to get busy. Really busy. I also want to check in with Jim’s son on anything I’d like to put in the garage sale or donate. Relations with his family are strained and I don’t want to have any issues with getting rid of something the family wants.

And here’s a couple of feel good notes to end with:

• That photo you see above really makes me smile. I was looking for a turquoise vase for my mantle when I turned toward the opposite side of the store and this canvas pulled me right over and spoke to me. Perfect colors – with turquoise, teal, white, and gold – and I see an angel in it! Do you? I love it when those ‘godwinks’ surprise us.

• Camp Widow Calgary here I come! Camp helped me so very much when I went to my first one a year after Vern died and started my ten year volunteering ‘job’ at 24 in-person and 2 virtual Camps. And since this first Camp in this new location happens to land on the one year date of Jim’s passing it felt just right for me. I’ve registered and now I’m searching for a Canadian Rockies/Banff tour to coincide with the Camp dates. (Yes – I put this task on my list, too.)