There has always been a big nature element in my life. Where I grew was not too far from San Diego, but in the 70,s it might as well have been the Outback because the average San Diegan considered it very rural. My parents hailed from Western PA, outside of Pittsburgh in small towns. My dad grew up exploring the woods and spending a lot of time outdoors. How they ended up in California was a mixup on the Navy’s part sending my dad to San Diego. When he got there, he loved it so much he vowed to move there when he got out of the navy and so that’s exactly what he and my mom did.
As an only child, I spent a lot of time entertaining myself outdoors. We had an acre of property, but most of it was up on a hill above the house. There were 2 giant boulders up there that I would climb up on. On a good day, you could almost see all the way to San Diego from up there.
For most the year, the weather was mild and the summers were hot, often reaching 100+. I remember walking barefoot in the back yard in the grass, picking fresh plums off the plum tree in late June.
When I was about 7, I remember conducting my own archaeological dig in that hill behind the house. Sadly, I didn’t find anything.
For many years, the parcel of land to the left of our house was vacant so I’d also go over there and ride my bike over the terrain.
In the summers, we’d also take vacations as my parents always had a travel trailer. So for about a month every year, we’d hit the road. They’d often ask me if there were any specific areas, parks, or activities I’d like to do and that would guide the whole trip.
This was long before cell phones and computers took over our lives and in many ways, I’m rather grateful I got to have a childhood with so much outdoor time. I know I certainly didn’t realize at the time how fortunate I really was.
By the time I was about 15, my priorities changed. I was super into music (it was the 80’s, and it was a fun time for music). I would get rides with slightly older friends up to L.A. and when I was 16 I started working at a record store.
I was finishing up high school (I graduated 6 months early) and planning college. I could have easily gone to SDSU or even UCSD, but no, I was desperate to get to L.A. and so I applied to UCLA School of Art and got accepted. Side note: had I never gone to UCLA, I would have never met Mario.
Besides the occasional trip to the beach, or out to the desert for a rave, being “out in nature” was seriously missing from my life. I fully emerged myself in the city. I was young and really wanted to have new experiences.
Of course, Mario was a big part of my life at that time, having met him while I was at UCLA. It wasn’t until long after college graduation and finally a move down to Orange County that the spark of the natural world started to take hold of me again. We were closer to the beach, but we also lived in a massive apartment complex with a lot of landscaping and water features. It was calming and relaxing just to walk around the complex.
I started to remember how much being in nature was a part of my life growing up. Mario and I would have long conversations about vacations we both took as kids and how much we enjoyed those. When his mom’s health took a turn for the worse, he started talking about moving away from Orange County… far away.
I had mentioned that back in the 90’s, my parents had bought 5 acres of property in Southern Oregon as a potential retirement spot, but they’d changed their minds about living that far out in the country. He was down to check out Oregon as a potential spot to relocate, so in late spring of 2006, we took our first exploratory trip up there.
What we found, was peace. The stress and the grind of the past 15 years had really gotten to us both and we were very much ready to get into a slower pace of life and get back to nature. We used to joke that we wanted to “disappear into the forest”.
A year later, we didn’t get a house in the forest, but we did get a great place on 2 acres. I don’t think Mario’s friends really realized how much he loved living in Oregon.
And even though nature was right outside the front door, we did enjoy going over to the coast or up to the mountains to get even further out.
I still enjoy that and I’m not going to pretend that him not being with me on those outdoor adventures doesn’t affect me. There is always at least one, if not more, points on a trip where I wish he could be there. I wish he could have stuck around. Every time I walk along the beach, I write a message for him in the sand, hoping the gentle ebb and flow of the waves will somehow gather the message and send it off to him.
Nature has always felt healing to me. There is an energy that comes from all natural things that can soothe the soul. As the years roll on, I find myself being more and more drawn back outside and to connect with nature and its healing energies in new ways. I’m sure if Mario were here, he’d be right there with me on that.
