Is anyone watching the new Matlock? (I am not going to give any spoilers, if you have not yet watched the recent episode – I am not saying anything more than what is in the description of the episode.)
In the recent episode, there is a case brought against an AI business. They created a program where AI takes tons of data about someone who has passed – their email, voicemail, text messages, additional info that showed their personalities, desires, tendencies in what decisions they would make in various scenarios. etc. The program takes this info, and creates an AI “video” of the person, so that you can talk with their loved one as if you are talking on Zoom. You can have a full on conversation, because the AI program has taken the personality of the person, and will predict what their responses, thoughts, etc will be in your conversation. The program was created for therapists working with grievers to help them through the grief process, and is done under supervision and guidance of a therapist.
ANYWHOO, this made me think, if this exists / existed (I was told some beta versions of this exists?) would I have wanted to use it when Lynn or my Mom or my Aunt or insert-loved-one-here had passed? My initial thought was / is, I definitely would have been drawn to it, but I think if I had used it, it could have delayed my process in accepting they were gone. This AI program definitely would have influenced my grief journey – I just have no idea how. But, I loved the show’s caveat that this program was created to be used carefully WITH professional guidance. I also think – I knew them best, or at least VERY VERY well. So when I wonder, “what would Lynn or my Mom say in this situation?” I automatically have the answer of what they would say at least 50% of the times that I ask myself this. Is that enough of the time? Yes and no. It’s not satisfying when I would LOVE to hear what they would say. But, it is also part of my grief process to feel the sadness that I will not get answer to my question. There are so many things about the grief journey that feels unresolved, unsatisfying, etc, and working thru that is part of moving forward.
Just an FYI – this next part is about mediums / psychics, and I know many don’t relate to this or believe it:
I have been seeing a medium regularly since Lynn passed, and I wondered, is doing so similar to this activity of talking to an AI version of a loved one? Does that delay my grief? And, I decided, no, it’s totally different. For one, the AI version takes the information from the time before a person passed away. In my medium sessions, I am “talking with” the continuously evolving spirit / energy of my loved ones, with the personality they have always had, but with their experiences SINCE they have passed. And their conversations, thoughts, insights reflect that. And, unlike the AI version, often Lynn or my Mother do not have much to say at all. They may flutter in and out of a session, or they may not show up at all especially if I have nothing to ask them directly. Most of my sessions nowadays are about what is going in my life now, spiritual questions I have, etc.
I still talk to Lynn, my Mom, my Aunt, etc frequently. We have casual conversations maybe daily along the lines of, Oh – you would have liked this restaurant, or, Yes, I know you would prefer I do X, but I am going to do Y. And, I still talk to them in intense ways, when I really DO want to hear them, but I don’t think an AI program would ever satisfy that need.

