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A Visit With Two Old Friends

Posted on: February 26, 2026 | Posted by: Gary Ravitz

On Sunday, I drove Robyn to the airport, then immediately went home to clean the place in anticipation of Craig and Donna’s expected arrival the following day. No rest for the wicked!

Craig and Donna are two of my closest friends. I first met them as a young lawyer shortly after I had accepted a position as a judicial law clerk to an appellate court judge, which required me to move to the relatively small city where the judge resided.

The place felt small and rural compared to my hometown, but it was a plum assignment I couldn’t refuse. My wife at the time didn’t immediately accompany me while she was establishing herself in her chosen field. Thus, except for the judge, I arrived not knowing another soul in the place.

***

A week or two later, I discovered a popular bar that had a couple of billiards tables. I was never much of a drinker, but I enjoyed shooting pool.  Over the course of one evening, I met Craig, who was holding down one of the two tables.  The informal rule was that if you won, you stayed.  We ended up playing as partners and held the table until closing time against all comers.

At the end of our evening, Craig invited me to join him and his wife for dinner at their home. In short order, a wonderful, lifelong friendship was established.

On the night we met, Craig told me he was planning to attend seminary school in a few months. I mentioned to my wife that I had met this guy shooting pool at a bar, who was planning to become a priest, and told her about our dinner, where I had met his delightful wife, Donna. My own wife, who was raised Catholic, laughed at my obvious mistake.  When I asked what was so funny, she reminded me that priests didn’t marry. Oops!

As things turned out, Craig and Donna are Lutherans.  In fact, until his recent death, Craig’s dad was an important Lutheran theologian who was long associated with the University of Chicago.

***

I met Craig’s father on several occasions through the years. He was stiff and formal.  Meanwhile, Craig is one of the most carefree, funniest individuals I’ve ever met.  In many ways, he was the opposite of his father. Craig dutifully attended seminary school but never completed the program, nor did he follow in his father’s professional footsteps.

Donna, in great measure, has been the pillar of their enduring and successful relationship. They raised four beautiful children, all of whom I consider my friends, and in their retirement enjoy a growing horde of grandchildren, some of whom are nearly full-grown. I might be biased, however, in my opinion, Craig and Donna’s children and grandchildren could do far worse than to emulate them. Indeed, from what I have witnessed over the long years of our friendship, all of the kids and grandchildren are solid, substantial people. They are a living tribute to my friends’ good characters, their deeply held beliefs, and a robust zest for life.

***

Craig and Donna departed this morning for Phoenix, where Craig has a younger sister. Meanwhile, we had a good but brief visit. I think they were a little sad to be leaving. Just like Robyn’s recent departure, I was a bit sad to see them go.  However, in just a couple of days, I start over, preparing for my next two visitors.  As I say, there is no rest for the wicked.

Categories: Widowed Effect on Family/Friends

About Gary Ravitz

In relevant part, my musings are for me. It’s one of the ways in which I process losing my sweetest. Of course, Lee didn’t want to die. She had fought like hell, but the relentless cancers kept coming: Skin cancers; breast cancer; head and neck cancer; colon cancer; and finally, the deadly pancreatic cancer. In June 2020, and only after being pressed hard by Lee, her oncologist opined that my wife had from two weeks to two months left to live, turned on her heels and nearly sprinted from the hospital room, never again to be seen or heard from by us. I promptly removed Lee from the hospital and brought her home. It was the right thing to do and I only wish I had acted sooner over “the best” medical advice to the contrary. In fact, my sweet wife only had nine days left to live. At the final, she embraced her own death with great courage and unfailing kindness. It was a truly remarkable display of grace and wondrous to behold. It was my great privilege and honor to be with her every step of the way. And now, it’s my privilege to be able to write a few words to you each week. In a nutshell, I believe every journey is unique, but, hopefully, to know that you do not have to walk it alone can also be reassuring. And, along the way, you might hear a bit more information about me.
Gary

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