Now that it’s October and we’re officially into “spooky season”, what better time than to talk about contacting spirits!
Often a widowed person (or really anyone who’s lost a loved one) may ask if there is a way to contact the spirit of their loved one. To me, it’s not an unusual question. It’s a very human question. For thousands of years people have tried to contact those who have left this physical realm.
Through my own experience, my best advice is working on your own intuition (I believe everyone has this) and really paying attention can help.
How do you “work on your intuition”? We’ve all heard of “gut instinct”, so that’s a good starting point. Remember times you’ve felt something like that and then pay close attention to when it happens again. Even if it’s something seemingly small, like a feeling like you shouldn’t eat a certain food, or drive down a certain road, take note, mindfully consider your decision and then note what, if any, outcome there was from the decision. As you go along, you might notice patterns of how things went when you “listened” to your intuition. Think of this as if it were “training”. Over time, you may notice that these instincts are clearly or you may not second guess yourself as much when you get “a feeling”. I know this seems a bit vague, because it also can be individualized, so that is another reason to mindfully experiment with it.
Here’s a good personal example of where intuition led to what I feel was a sign from Mario…
I was camping at a campground we didn’t actually get to go to when he was alive. I had just finished eating dinner, so I was walking around the campground. It was mid week and there were not a lot of people there. As I was walking, I got the feeling that I should go off the road I was walking on and cut through 2 empty camp spots to get back to mine. I walked into the first spot and on the tree ahead of me was a single playing card stuck in the bark. The card was the 9 of hearts. I’m into fortune telling with cards, tarot and regular cards. So it was certainly meaningful. I took it as contentment and happiness (could also mean a dream or wish fulfilled). And that could be two fold – that Mario himself was content and happy now without disease and fighting his demons and/or he was wishing me contentment and happiness. Either way, I definitely took that as a sign, both the feeling I had to suddenly want to cut through empty camp spots, and then the single card, and what card it was, in a place that I only would have seen it if I cut across those spots.
Another thing I’ve noticed over time is when something just “pops” into my head, it could be more meaningful (not necessarily a sign from a passed love one, but could be other meaningful or important information, if that makes sense). This is also something you could actually experiment with when it comes to your departed spouse, though. Here’s another personal example …
Mario really loved LEGO. On the night he died, I came home and of course was an emotional wreck. He had left a mostly finished LEGO robot on the dining room table. I figured it would be a good distraction, so I sat down and went through the instruction booklet and looking for the right bricks. I got to the end, but one piece seemed to be missing. I looked all over the table and around on the floor and couldn’t find it. So I sat there for a minute, then said, out loud, “Mario … where is this last piece?” The answer literally popped into my head – under the cat bag (which was a crinkly bag toy for the cats). I got up, looked under the cat bag, and there was the missing piece. Weird, right? I have no other explanation for that one besides “external” information/communication coming directly to me.
Ask a question, see if there’s an answer. That’s the experiment. Remember, paying attention is key.
On the night Mario died, I had brought his old iPod music player to the hospital. It played for like a few minutes then it died. I got the feeling that he didn’t want to listen to the same music he always listened to, so instead, I brought up tracks that we both knew on my phone until he passed. When I got home, I pulled the iPod out of the plastic hospital bag of his belongings and it sprang to life. This was after I could not, no matter what I did, get that thing working at the hospital. There was also some weirdness with the monitor of his old computer “glowing” (for lack of a better description) oddly. Then there were the “footstep” sounds and odd “cracking”. All of these are good examples of what I call “environmental” signs – ones that you can actually experience in your environment with your own senses. It could be something you hear, like specific noises or even a voice; something you actually see, from an actual apparition to a certain object; something you smell, like a favorite cologne or perfume; or even something you feel, like a phantom touch.
I find these sorts of things way more random. My own theory is that since we’re all energy beings, there may be some way that those who have left their physical bodies are able to use energy to manipulate things in this plane. Are they “signs”? Could be, could be something totally normal too. While I do believe some things ARE signs, I try not to reach too far into things that fall into this category. For me, a sign is more of a sign when it has special meaning to me. I try not to make something “fit” when it comes to meaning … has to be clear and obvious from the start. So my advice would be to not search too hard for meaning if it isn’t obvious from the start. Of course there are always exceptions. For example, something might come up where there isn’t something obvious, but like a day later it becomes crystal clear. Once again, paying attention is key.
I will say that for me, the most signs came in the first year. I have my theories about that. The first 12 months are the absolute worst. I probably needed little bits of comfort like that the most during that time. But there have been little things here and there ever since he passed (so over 4 years at the time I’m writing this).
What I would caution against, is looking for a medium. Not that I’m against mediums as I certainly am not. It’s also not that I don’t believe that some people are genuine articles, because some definitely are. I just know a lot of people aren’t. There have been charlatans throughout history taking advantage of the fact most of us want to know our dead loved ones are okay and we still want to communicate with them. It’s very easy to fall into the habit of trying medium after medium (and spending $$$). Feel free to give it a whirl if you feel strongly about a certain medium, but go into it without any expectations. Be aware that there are people out there who are experts at pulling info through everything from questioning to watching body language and listening to your voice.
