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widowhood and moving forward

Unexpected Weeping Session

November 28, 2023 by Kathie Neff Leave a Comment

Coffee mug that says "Hold on to the Love."

Arrives as Gift   It all started with a parrot, followed by two or more yapping chihuahuas. A din. The parrot screamed: Mom! Mom! Incessant barking sounded through the fence as loud, or louder, than a pack of small dogs sounding an alarm at close range. Were they being corralled? Or ostracized from being cozy […]

Filed Under: Widowed, Widowed Memories, Widowed and Healing, Widowed Holidays, Widowed Emotions Tagged With: healing for widowed, widowhood and moving forward, memories, widowed sadness, widowhood and traditions, hope for widowed, milestones

Things They’ve Missed

November 14, 2023 by Kathie Neff Leave a Comment

newborn infant swaddled in green blanket

Or Have They? There are plenty of things about widowhood that are “stage” reliant. How many days, weeks, or months its been since our person died. How many years since they left us. But the category of “things they missed” seems to come round no matter the specifics of time. It’s a category that never […]

Filed Under: Widowed, Widowed Memories, Widowed and Healing, Widowed Milestones, Widowed Emotions Tagged With: widowhood and moving forward, widowed missing him, widowhood and traditions, hope for widowed, healing for widowed

An Invitation: Be Water

October 4, 2023 by Kathie Neff Leave a Comment

Still water creek beneath a bridge.

  Be water. Flowing, flexible and soft.   a still pond invites insect landings; water responds with ripples (My responses to life can be gentle or fierce)   Subtly powerful   power lurks—ALIVE—just beneath the surface (Am I in tune with the power within me?)   still waters contrast with powerful flash floods  wreaking destruction […]

Filed Under: Newly Widowed, Widowed, Widowed and Healing, Widowed Milestones, Widowed Emotions Tagged With: hope for widowed, healing for widowed, widowhood and moving forward

Self Compassion

September 26, 2023 by Kathie Neff Leave a Comment

Woman looking in mirror while sitting in a field

Revisited The poetry in italics are quotes from a blog post entitled Self Compassion written by my earlier widowed self. This post is a clarification and love note to my current widowed self.   When words don’t come easily I write in poetry. In May of 2023, I was trying to capture Self Compassion because […]

Filed Under: Newly Widowed, Widowed, Widowed and Healing, Widowed Milestones, Widowed Emotions Tagged With: hope for widowed, milestones, healing for widowed, widowhood and moving forward

Introverts: Stay in the Work

September 20, 2023 by Kathie Neff 1 Comment

hands holding a post note saying "keep going"

I get overwhelmed easily with “too many” of anything. Too many choices, too many words at first glance, too many ways to find my way to peace and healing. I have to back away. Take a beat. If I understood myself as an introvert earlier in my life, it is likely I could have avoided […]

Filed Under: Newly Widowed, Widowed, Widowed and Healing, Widowed Emotions, Widowed Community Tagged With: hope for widowed, milestones, healing for widowed, widowhood and moving forward

A Widowed Introvert: Part Four

September 13, 2023 by Kathie Neff 2 Comments

Ribbon cutting ceremony for SS Resilience Center

How does resilience help widowed people heal? The Soaring Spirits Resilience Center research team asked widowed people to help us define resilience as it applies to the widowed experience and the results are inspiring. –Soaring Spirits Website  The time I first heard about the Soaring Spirits Resilience Center in the Texas Hill Country, I wanted […]

Filed Under: Newly Widowed, Widowed, Widowed and Healing, Widowed Milestones, Widowed Emotions, Widowed Community Tagged With: hope for widowed, healing for widowed, widowhood and moving forward, widowed community

A Widowed Introvert: Part Three

September 6, 2023 by Kathie Neff 2 Comments

RESILIENCE Resilience is the ability to withstand adversity and bounce back from difficult life events. Being resilient does not mean a person doesn’t experience stress, emotional upheaval, and suffering. Resilience involves the ability to work through emotional pain and suffering. — Katie Hurley, LCSW The quote reminds me of the Japanese proverb that says Fall […]

Filed Under: Newly Widowed, Widowed, Widowed and Healing, Widowed Emotions, Widowed Community Tagged With: hope for widowed, healing for widowed, widowhood and moving forward

A Widowed Introvert: Part Two

August 29, 2023 by Kathie Neff 2 Comments

Silouette of woman crying.

What Grief Adds to the Mix In talking with other introverts, many report that grief adds one more layer to navigate in the world. One more layer in addition to the fact that grief is overwhelming in and of itself. The introvert’s experience of grief is different…for me, it was almost an out-of-body experience. I […]

Filed Under: Newly Widowed, Widowed, Widowed Memories, Widowed and Healing, Widowed Milestones, Widowed Emotions, Widowed Community Tagged With: newly widowed, hope for widowed, healing for widowed, widowhood and moving forward

Healing Support Tools:

August 16, 2023 by Kathie Neff Leave a Comment

People around a meal table with many food dishes.

A Simple Dinner Party for Widowed Folk The clutter of food leftovers waiting for containers is evidence of an evening’s gift of food, conversation, kindness, and even laughter! Welcome to the Soaring Spirits Regional Social Group experience! For the first two years of widowhood my inbox featured a regular invitation to join with other widowed […]

Filed Under: Newly Widowed, Widowed, Widowed and Healing, Widowed Milestones, Widowed Community Tagged With: Widowed Lonliness, widowhood and moving forward, hope for widowed, healing for widowed

Seeking Solutions

August 9, 2023 by Kathie Neff Leave a Comment

Various colored post-it notes searching for ideas.

Along the Path of Widowhood The cornerstone of my training as a doula comes from Birthing From Within, a process of childbirth education that originated from Pam England’s book, Birthing From Within: An Extraordinary Method of Childbirth Preparation. A few years into my training, I learned a process called Solution-Focused Dialogue. After a year’s practice […]

Filed Under: Widowed, Widowed and Healing, Widowed Emotions Tagged With: hope for widowed, healing for widowed, widowhood and moving forward

5 Remarks That Moved Me

July 26, 2023 by Kathie Neff Leave a Comment

the number 5 in gold on a green background

at Camp Widow San Diego: Keynote 2023 There is one talk that most everyone attends on Saturday morning of Camp Widow: The Keynote Speech. I’m sure there are some exceptions, but very few since all the latecomers have arrived by then and it is one of a few talks that finds all of us in […]

Filed Under: Widowed, Widowed Memories, Widowed and Healing, Widowed Emotions Tagged With: hope for widowed, healing for widowed, widowhood and moving forward

Revisiting a Story by the Nasturtiums

July 11, 2023 by Kathie Neff Leave a Comment

nasturtium plant with bright orange blooms

On the Eve of Camp Widow San Diego — 2023 It is a joy and a privilege to attend Camp Widow’s 15th Anniversary camp in San Diego this Thursday. A-a-a-a-n-d — I am not packed! This is a revised post from February 2022, offering a vision of hope through the lovely nasturtiums.   Studying a […]

Filed Under: Newly Widowed, Widowed, Widowed and Healing, Widowed Milestones, Widowed Emotions Tagged With: widowhood and moving forward, memories, hope for widowed, milestones, healing for widowed

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