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Child Loss

Life After Death Through Three Lenses of Change

February 4, 2020 by Emma Pearson Leave a Comment

In my recent experience learning about Human Dynamic Systems, one of the frameworks I was introduced to was called “Three Kinds of Change”. It posits that there are three types of change we face, and knowing what kind we are experiencing is important to helping us find appropriate ways of working with it. It occurred to me to look at aspects of…

Filed Under: Widowed Emotions, Multiple Losses Tagged With: multiple losses, grief and pain, widow grief, Child Loss

A Good Week?

January 28, 2020 by Emma Pearson Leave a Comment

It’s been a good week. By most objective and subjective measures, it’s been a good week. For me. And I realise it’s been a horrendous week and few days for anyone who is newly widowed, grieving, going through date landmines, dealing with death-admin. I am not a follower of Basketball, American or any other type, but god knows I have some…

Filed Under: Widowed, Widowed Emotions, Multiple Losses Tagged With: widowed reaction public death, Child Loss, widowed, multiple losses, widowed happiness

Sticky Issues

January 21, 2020 by Emma Pearson Leave a Comment

When I was turning 20, (back in the last millennium, and indeed more than a decade before its end), a few people asked me, “what do you want for your 20th birthday?” I answered, “Twenty years between now and when I am 30”. I thought it was a very clever answer. And it was also an honest answer, based on my worldview at the time. My…

Filed Under: Widowed, Multiple Losses Tagged With: widowed, multiple losses, Child Loss

Too Many Deaths. Really. That’s Enough Now

January 14, 2020 by Emma Pearson Leave a Comment

I have just come back from what should have been two lovely days away with my Medjool. My new love. My number two. (Not Second Best. Just Number Two. Subtle but Important difference).  Some of our time away was lovely – truly relaxing, soothing, stunningly beautiful, comforting, renewing, and more. And some of it was just plain horrid. For me.

Filed Under: Widowed Emotions, Multiple Losses Tagged With: widowed, multiple losses, Child Loss, widowed sadness

997, 998, 999, 1000

January 7, 2020 by Emma Pearson Leave a Comment

Today is Friday 3rd January 2020. 3/1/2020 Or 1/3/2020 if you’re somewhere in North America, but that looks plain wrong to me. And anyway, that would be my dad’s birthday, 1st March. Not my uncle’s birthday, 3rd January. Both healthy, sporty, fit 81-year old men. 82 now for my uncle.  Today is 1000 days since Mike died. In about ten minutes,…

Filed Under: Widowed Milestones, Multiple Losses Tagged With: widowed, multiple losses, ashes, time, Child Loss

Mixed Up Emotions

December 31, 2019 by Emma Pearson Leave a Comment

I noticed Kelley Lynn put up a couple of lovely questions on her Facebook page in the run-up to Christmas. It went along the lines of:  Tell me, what/who are you missing? And if you’re joyful, then say more about that  It’s Christmas morning, and I am sitting in bed. No rush here, because for over a decade, Mike and I said to our guests,…

Filed Under: Widowed Holidays, Widowed Emotions, Multiple Losses Tagged With: multiple losses, widowed holidays, widowed mixed emotions, Christmas, Child Loss

Bah Humbug

December 17, 2019 by Emma Pearson 1 Comment

I am trying to get festive. I really am. But little things tick me off. Like Christmas decorations. Particularly the really garish ones. And the plastic snowmen. The ones in our house are okay. Right now, that’s the sum total of an undecorated Christmas tree. And fairy lights that never actually went down after Christmas 2017. Somehow they have…

Filed Under: Widowed, Widowed Holidays, Multiple Losses Tagged With: Holidays, Christmas, Child Loss, widowed, multiple losses, widowed holidays

Self-Care, Help, and Letting in Comfort

December 10, 2019 by Emma Pearson Leave a Comment

I have been pondering comfort, self-care, and help – what each of them is, to me, and what makes one or other easier and/or more accessible than another. Here is where I am at. And no, I have done no Googling or other research into what each of them is. Just research in my own life and experience. They are oft-used terms in Griefland – wobbly…

Filed Under: Widowed, Widowed Therapy, Multiple Losses, Miscellaneous Tagged With: widow self care, seeking comfort, Child Loss, widowed, multiple losses, therapy, help, support

It’s About Time

December 3, 2019 by Emma Pearson Leave a Comment

Emma Family

Yes. I know. I have a funny thing about time. And dates. I take time to reflect on time and what time is, or might be. Linear? Circular? Fluid? Fixed? Conceptual? Real? Polychronic? Monochronic? Measurable? Full of meaning and emotion? Or void of emotion and meaning? Time takes on such a different meaning, a different feel, post-loss. People say…

Filed Under: Widowed Emotions, Multiple Losses, Miscellaneous Tagged With: widowed sadness, multiple losses, time, grief and pain, Child Loss

Mourning Glories

November 26, 2019 by Emma Pearson Leave a Comment

One of my favourite widbuds is Charlotte, who I met last year at the Soaring Spirits Camp Widow event in Toronto 2018. She is beautiful and strong and capable and clever and funny. And she’s grieving. And despite her grieving, she attended my daughter’s funeral, “just because she happened to be in Europe at the time”. We are both in a…

Filed Under: Widowed Effect on Family/Friends, Widowed Community, Multiple Losses Tagged With: friends, multiple losses, widowed friendships, cleaning the closets, Child Loss

I Love You Like I Love Mike

November 19, 2019 by Emma Pearson 1 Comment

A little over 6 months ago, at the end of April 2019, two months before my 15 year-old daughter Julia died by suicide, and 2 years after Mike my husband died, I met a man on a dating website. He’s called Medjool, after my favourite kind of dates. Big, chewy, tasty, sweet. Yum.  Since there seems to be some kind of annoying gender difference…

Filed Under: Widowed and New Love, Widowed Emotions, Multiple Losses Tagged With: multiple losses, widowed dating, widowed finding happiness again, new love for widowed, Child Loss

Maudlin

November 5, 2019 by Emma Pearson Leave a Comment

One of the patterns I have noticed in friends’ responses to whatever I happen to post on social media is that, when I post some good news, “happy photos”, or an achievement, I get 3 or 4 times as many “likes”, comments, and whoopy doos, than if I post something hard, messy, painful and tough. There the sorrow just hangs out its forlorn…

Filed Under: Widowed Emotions, Multiple Losses Tagged With: pain, Child Loss, social media, widowed sadness, multiple losses

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